Ground Hog day

wednesday and thursday
Writing this briefly as I don't have much inclination at the moment to write - sorry!
Theres not much to report, each day is roughly the same, just a matter of holding on and waiting for improvement. Meal times are about just trying to get any energy past my macerated mouth. I have been on sickly fluids, milk based drinks, ice creams, custard, jelly for days now, since New year. This suddenly drives me crazy. I need normal food!! Given the condition of my mouth, with open wounds from the mucitis, it is a perfect breeding ground for infection, so another major part of my day is keeping my mouth clean with various gargles and medicines. My guts too are very painful, lets just put it this way, especially when they are used! So all the normally simple jobs (ha ha) are hard work and painful at the moment.
On Wednesday I decide I need real food, I have in front of me mash and chicken in a spicy sweet sour sauce. Maybe... I end up washing the sauce (which is pure acid to my mouth) of the chicken in the soup (!), and then mashing it to a pulp and adding to the mash. Then I place bits on the back of my tongue and swallow whole, no chewing! This seems to work so carry on for ages until the chicken is eaten. Feeling pretty pleased with myself on how many sweet drinks i have just saved myself from having!
A highlight of the day is the blood test result, but unfortunately each day the important result, the neutraphils (the really useful white cells which defend your bod) has been the same: zero, nada, not a single one.
So yeah the last 7 days have been like my own very bad Ground Hog day. Frustrating for sure, and not pleasant, but I am sure things will improve soon!